A clinician discusses the challenges of overcoming a victimhood mentality and negative self-talk, emphasizing the importance of gradual progress and readiness for change.
Avoiding to deal with one's trauma and not taking accountability for one's actions leads to a cycle of victim mentality, blaming others and having a difficult life. One needs to do the work to heal oneself and take accountability for one's actions.
The world is not out to get you and people rarely think twice about what you do. It's important to recognize independent traumas and seek sympathy for them, but the weight of the world is not on your shoulders.
The speaker explains how they do not prefer to be labeled as a victim or survivor, but rather hopes that by disclosing their experiences, the shame is shifted onto the perpetrator where it belongs.
Beating yourself up over past mistakes is only useful if it helps you recognize the harm caused and take ownership to avoid repeating it. However, holding onto that shame for years and decades is not productive for personal growth, and it's essential to integrate the lesson, heal, and move on.