Episode
Ep. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
1:28:23
Published: Mon May 25 2020
Description
Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura are back in the cave once again. Bert has a new perspective on Karl Malone. Tom and Bert then start going doing lists to see which alt comics don't know them, which leads them to a more fun conversation on which black comedians don't know them. We even call up black expert Neal Brennan to weigh in! We find out Tom’s experience driving a McLaren after he gives the Kreischer girls a ride. We then get into the discussion of fighting and each of the bears have their own technique. Tom is really aching to cause damage to someone. Will anybody volunteer? Plus, reactions to more of your comments and memes!
Chapters
A podcast host shares a story about receiving an ultimatum from a friend for speaking out against racism while also giving a shoutout to a person who doesn't deserve it.
00:00 - 02:18 (02:18)
Summary
A podcast host shares a story about receiving an ultimatum from a friend for speaking out against racism while also giving a shoutout to a person who doesn't deserve it.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
In this podcast episode, the hosts discuss personal preferences such as performing tasks while being hot or cold, buying merchandise, and infomercials.
03:40 - 07:39 (03:59)
Summary
In this podcast episode, the hosts discuss personal preferences such as performing tasks while being hot or cold, buying merchandise, and infomercials.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speech provided is nonsensical and lacks coherency, making it difficult to extract any meaningful information from it.
07:39 - 09:39 (02:00)
Summary
The speech provided is nonsensical and lacks coherency, making it difficult to extract any meaningful information from it.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The hosts discuss the controversial practice of testing friends' loyalty by sending them racist texts and analyzing their responses.
09:39 - 11:58 (02:18)
Summary
The hosts discuss the controversial practice of testing friends' loyalty by sending them racist texts and analyzing their responses.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker shares their opinion on Michael Jordan's personality as depicted in "The Last Dance" documentary, noting that he comes across as reasonable and accomplished.
11:58 - 15:44 (03:45)
Summary
The speaker shares their opinion on Michael Jordan's personality as depicted in "The Last Dance" documentary, noting that he comes across as reasonable and accomplished. They also marvel at Jordan's physical ability and performance on the court.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker critiques a writer who suggests that viewers of "The Last Dance" documentary can learn that they don't have to be like Michael Jordan.
15:44 - 18:40 (02:56)
Summary
The speaker critiques a writer who suggests that viewers of "The Last Dance" documentary can learn that they don't have to be like Michael Jordan. The speaker also shares a humorous anecdote about Dennis Rodman's antics during his time playing for the Chicago Bulls.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker struggles with comparing athletes as some are incredibly driven and view hard work as a means to an end, while others like Michael Jordan may not consider their hard work as "work" at all.
18:40 - 23:49 (05:09)
Summary
The speaker struggles with comparing athletes as some are incredibly driven and view hard work as a means to an end, while others like Michael Jordan may not consider their hard work as "work" at all.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker discusses the trend of people wanting to connect on a personal level with those they network with by utilizing small talk such as shared experiences, like meeting at a graduation ceremony.
23:49 - 26:34 (02:45)
Summary
The speaker discusses the trend of people wanting to connect on a personal level with those they network with by utilizing small talk such as shared experiences, like meeting at a graduation ceremony.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker believes that Jerry Seinfeld, who is known to be into comedy, knows their identity and that of the listener.
26:34 - 28:22 (01:47)
Summary
The speaker believes that Jerry Seinfeld, who is known to be into comedy, knows their identity and that of the listener.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Comedians discuss whether or not famous comedians know who they are and mention their past experiences with them.
28:22 - 30:23 (02:01)
Summary
Comedians discuss whether or not famous comedians know who they are and mention their past experiences with them.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker discusses how Seinfeld is very familiar with other New York-based comedians such as Mark Norman and Nelson.
30:23 - 33:58 (03:35)
Summary
The speaker discusses how Seinfeld is very familiar with other New York-based comedians such as Mark Norman and Nelson.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker talks about a conversation with his kids regarding a large family they knew and the question of whether there were any special needs children in the family.
33:58 - 35:59 (02:01)
Summary
The speaker talks about a conversation with his kids regarding a large family they knew and the question of whether there were any special needs children in the family.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
H. John Benjamin discusses how some people recognize him for his work in the comic industry while others are not aware of his contributions.
35:59 - 37:56 (01:57)
Summary
H. John Benjamin discusses how some people recognize him for his work in the comic industry while others are not aware of his contributions.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Comedian Sarah Silverman shares one of her favorite moments of watching a friend get an ass wax, and promotes her podcast conversation with comedian Pat Brown.
37:56 - 40:49 (02:52)
Summary
Comedian Sarah Silverman shares one of her favorite moments of watching a friend get an ass wax, and promotes her podcast conversation with comedian Pat Brown.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
No relevant content or topic discussed, except for mentioning new tour dates and promising not to do anything with a phone.
40:49 - 42:12 (01:22)
Summary
No relevant content or topic discussed, except for mentioning new tour dates and promising not to do anything with a phone.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speakers discuss the consequences of touching a police officer and reflect on the differing opinions on police behavior.
42:12 - 45:50 (03:38)
Summary
The speakers discuss the consequences of touching a police officer and reflect on the differing opinions on police behavior.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
In this podcast episode, the hosts discuss someone who sounds like a different person when he's aware he's being listened to, versus when he's talking casually.
45:50 - 48:36 (02:45)
Summary
In this podcast episode, the hosts discuss someone who sounds like a different person when he's aware he's being listened to, versus when he's talking casually. They describe it as "sounding like a white guy" and compare him to Will Smith.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker tells a brief story about encountering a Latino man who gave him a nasty look.
48:36 - 51:41 (03:05)
Summary
The speaker tells a brief story about encountering a Latino man who gave him a nasty look.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Brandon Shaw shares a story about how he used his MMA skills to teach a lesson to someone who was engaging in bad behavior in his neighborhood.
51:41 - 54:06 (02:25)
Summary
Brandon Shaw shares a story about how he used his MMA skills to teach a lesson to someone who was engaging in bad behavior in his neighborhood.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
A listener offers his face to be elbowed by Tom, who previously expressed a desire to elbow someone in the face.
54:06 - 55:37 (01:31)
Summary
A listener offers his face to be elbowed by Tom, who previously expressed a desire to elbow someone in the face.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
This transcript excerpt from a podcast features an unintelligible conversation about a man insulting another man's dog, as well as a description of the insultee's appearance.
55:37 - 59:31 (03:54)
Summary
This transcript excerpt from a podcast features an unintelligible conversation about a man insulting another man's dog, as well as a description of the insultee's appearance.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
A man who appeared to be a painter beats up three kids who were causing trouble, and challenges onlookers who act like they know him.
59:31 - 1:02:11 (02:40)
Summary
A man who appeared to be a painter beats up three kids who were causing trouble, and challenges onlookers who act like they know him.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
A story about a seven-minute fight, where a kid was harassing fellow passengers on a train, and one person decides to take a stand.
1:02:11 - 1:04:55 (02:44)
Summary
A story about a seven-minute fight, where a kid was harassing fellow passengers on a train, and one person decides to take a stand.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Thomas shares a story of how one man disrespecting another by putting his foot on his chair led to a violent incident, emphasizing the importance of respecting other human beings.
1:04:55 - 1:07:23 (02:28)
Summary
Thomas shares a story of how one man disrespecting another by putting his foot on his chair led to a violent incident, emphasizing the importance of respecting other human beings.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The hosts discuss the power of memories in shaping the way we perceive ourselves and the world around us, including moments where we may have missed an opportunity to stand up for ourselves.
1:07:23 - 1:09:38 (02:14)
Summary
The hosts discuss the power of memories in shaping the way we perceive ourselves and the world around us, including moments where we may have missed an opportunity to stand up for ourselves.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker expresses their frustration with traffic on a busy street and admits to yelling out in frustration.
1:09:38 - 1:12:04 (02:26)
Summary
The speaker expresses their frustration with traffic on a busy street and admits to yelling out in frustration. Despite heavy congestion, they were able to catch green lights that other drivers weren't.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker describes their tactics to bully Blackberry into a corporate partnership by repeatedly reposting their content on social media and forcing them to notice.
1:12:04 - 1:14:48 (02:43)
Summary
The speaker describes their tactics to bully Blackberry into a corporate partnership by repeatedly reposting their content on social media and forcing them to notice.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
A Twitter user tells the story of how tweeting about luxury cars and a snack food led to thousands of replies and a sponsorship opportunity.
1:14:48 - 1:16:56 (02:08)
Summary
A Twitter user tells the story of how tweeting about luxury cars and a snack food led to thousands of replies and a sponsorship opportunity.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker discusses car shopping with her daughter Georgia, who is turning 16 soon and is now 6'3.
1:16:56 - 1:19:57 (03:01)
Summary
The speaker discusses car shopping with her daughter Georgia, who is turning 16 soon and is now 6'3.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker discusses a conversation about a dangerous car and questions whether it would be appropriate for a 16-year-old to drive.
1:19:57 - 1:23:51 (03:54)
Summary
The speaker discusses a conversation about a dangerous car and questions whether it would be appropriate for a 16-year-old to drive.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
The speaker shares anecdotes about their children's humorous observations and nighttime routines, including one child's habit of taking late-night bathroom breaks.
1:23:51 - 1:26:33 (02:42)
Summary
The speaker shares anecdotes about their children's humorous observations and nighttime routines, including one child's habit of taking late-night bathroom breaks.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Comedians discuss the popularity of their merchandise and joke about the exorbitant cost of producing television shows.
1:26:34 - 1:27:52 (01:18)
Summary
Comedians discuss the popularity of their merchandise and joke about the exorbitant cost of producing television shows.
EpisodeEp. 31 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Podcast2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Join comedians Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura in their podcast Two Bears One Cave, where they share stories, jokes, and raunchy humor while drinking a bit of booze and exploring different topics, without any scripts or apologies.
1:27:52 - 1:28:05 (00:12)
Summary
Join comedians Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura in their podcast Two Bears One Cave, where they share stories, jokes, and raunchy humor while drinking a bit of booze and exploring different topics, without any scripts or apologies.