Episode
811 Find Lasting Love with Matthew Hussey
1:33:59
Published: Mon Jun 17 2019
Description
BUILD YOUR CASTLE. Love at first sight is bullshit. A relationship is like a castle. You find a plot of land that has a lot of potential. Then, bit by bit, you build the castle. But it takes work from both of you. One person can’t be laying the bricks while the other is home watching TV. After lots of hard work, you’ll have something unique and ornate that belongs to you. You’ll have a castle. That’s love. On today’s episode of The School of Greatness, I talk about the key to lasting relationships with an international guru of the dating and relationship-coaching scene: Matthew Hussey. Matthew Hussey is a speaker, New York Times Bestselling author, columnist for Cosmopolitan Magazine, and dating expert on ABC’s digital series What To Text Him Back. His corporate clients include Hugo Boss, The Perfume Shop, Virgin Gyms, Procter & Gamble, Bare Escentuals, U.S. legal giant Weil Gotshal & Manges, and global management consultants Accenture. 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online. Matthew says that the “activation energy” for starting relationships is lower than ever. This causes ghosting. People are less invested in relationships. But there are ways you can meet people indirectly. So get ready to learn the three things you need to build a great relationship on Episode 811. Some Questions I Ask: Do people even want to have a committed, long term relationship? (19:00) Is a great relationship when you stop thinking about your needs and not expecting anything in return? (21:30) How do we step outside of the emotional feelings in a relationship? (25:00) When do you know you’re ready for a committed, intimate relationship? (47:00) What are the three things you need to have to sustain a relationship? (52:00) In This Episode You Will Learn: About “activation energy” and why things like Tinder make it low (10:00) Why space is important in order to not react emotionally (30:00) About the “castle” metaphor and why you need to build together (38:00) Why the “trash cans” define your relationship more than the highlights (45:00) The four stages of all relationships (1:02:30) The first step you can do to get out of the weeds of singlehood (1:11:30) If you enjoyed this episode, check out the video, show notes, and more at www.lewishowes.com/811 and follow at instagram.com/lewishowes
Chapters
Matthew Hussey, a dating expert and bestselling author, has established himself as one of the leading experts in the field of human attraction.
00:00 - 08:35 (08:35)
Summary
Matthew Hussey, a dating expert and bestselling author, has established himself as one of the leading experts in the field of human attraction. With programs across the world, Hussey has helped thousands of men and women understand relationships better and reach their true potential.
Episode811 Find Lasting Love with Matthew Hussey
PodcastThe School of Greatness
Matthew Hussey gives relationship advice on how to stand out in a long-term committed relationship and how to communicate your discomfort to your partner in a loving way.
08:35 - 37:11 (28:35)
Summary
Matthew Hussey gives relationship advice on how to stand out in a long-term committed relationship and how to communicate your discomfort to your partner in a loving way. He emphasizes the importance of understanding and supporting your partner's needs to build a great relationship.
Episode811 Find Lasting Love with Matthew Hussey
PodcastThe School of Greatness
The success of a relationship is defined by the moments; the little things that barely get noticed, such as taking out the trash or supporting your partner in private.
37:11 - 46:28 (09:17)
Summary
The success of a relationship is defined by the moments; the little things that barely get noticed, such as taking out the trash or supporting your partner in private. Building a successful relationship requires hard work and mutual investment from both partners.
Episode811 Find Lasting Love with Matthew Hussey
PodcastThe School of Greatness
There are five components to a foundation of a relationship that has potential to thrive long-term: showing up for your partner in ways they need, paying attention to their needs, accepting that love does not conquer all, acknowledging compatibility, and admiring each other.
46:28 - 1:03:58 (17:30)
Summary
There are five components to a foundation of a relationship that has potential to thrive long-term: showing up for your partner in ways they need, paying attention to their needs, accepting that love does not conquer all, acknowledging compatibility, and admiring each other.
Episode811 Find Lasting Love with Matthew Hussey
PodcastThe School of Greatness
In this episode, the host discusses the power of expressing love through letters and reflects on advice he would give to his younger self on becoming the best partner in a relationship.
1:03:59 - 1:20:53 (16:54)
Summary
In this episode, the host discusses the power of expressing love through letters and reflects on advice he would give to his younger self on becoming the best partner in a relationship.
Episode811 Find Lasting Love with Matthew Hussey
PodcastThe School of Greatness
Relationship expert Johnny Fernandez emphasizes the importance of realness, vulnerability, and being upfront in relationships.
1:20:53 - 1:32:53 (11:59)
Summary
Relationship expert Johnny Fernandez emphasizes the importance of realness, vulnerability, and being upfront in relationships. He shares his personal struggles with reacting and wishing to have handled things differently and advises on the significance of questioning and being kinder to oneself.