Episode
#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
4:21:20
Published: Mon May 23 2022
Description
Sarma Melngailis is a chef and restauranteur who was the subject of the Netflix documentary Bad Vegan: Fame, Fraud, Fugitives. Please support this podcast by checking out our sponsors: - Mailgun: https://lexfridman.com/mailgun - BiOptimizers: http://www.magbreakthrough.com/lex to get 10% off - Notion: https://notion.com/startups to get up to $1000 off team plan - BetterHelp: https://betterhelp.com/lex to get 10% off - Eight Sleep: https://www.eightsleep.com/lex and use code LEX to get special savings EPISODE LINKS: Sarma's Twitter: https://twitter.com/sarma Sarma's Instagram: https://instagram.com/sarmamelngailis Sarma's Website: https://sarmaraw.com Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (book): https://amzn.to/3G9pMvs Party of One (book): https://amzn.to/3NtcH2n Beautiful Ruins (book): https://amzn.to/38Cfgkc Darkness Visible (book): https://amzn.to/3tdxoYL Projections (book): https://amzn.to/38DrRDJ Confessions of a Sociopath (book): https://amzn.to/3sM39Ys On Love (book): https://amzn.to/3sS3Orj Dear Reader (book): https://amzn.to/39JPE4M PODCAST INFO: Podcast website: https://lexfridman.com/podcast Apple Podcasts: https://apple.co/2lwqZIr Spotify: https://spoti.fi/2nEwCF8 RSS: https://lexfridman.com/feed/podcast/ YouTube Full Episodes: https://youtube.com/lexfridman YouTube Clips: https://youtube.com/lexclips SUPPORT & CONNECT: - Check out the sponsors above, it's the best way to support this podcast - Support on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/lexfridman - Twitter: https://twitter.com/lexfridman - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lexfridman - LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lexfridman - Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lexfridman - Medium: https://medium.com/@lexfridman OUTLINE: Here's the timestamps for the episode. On some podcast players you should be able to click the timestamp to jump to that time. (00:00) - Introduction (07:44) - Childhood (12:46) - Films (23:17) - Gifts (32:20) - Favorite food creations (38:31) - Leon: The Pitbull (50:39) - Bad Vegan (1:02:41) - Abusive relationship (1:07:24) - Remorse for employees (1:13:19) - Sociopathy (1:23:44) - How Sarma met Anthony Strangis (1:45:43) - Retrospection (1:58:24) - Johnny Depp and Amber Heard (2:06:17) - Is Anthony Strangis a sociopath? (2:10:24) - What Bad Vegan got wrong (2:27:40) - Darkest personal discovery (2:38:22) - Road trip from hell (2:45:36) - Wild stories (2:54:33) - Prison (3:04:13) - Ghislaine Maxwell (3:19:44) - Running restaurants (3:33:26) - Last meal (3:37:50) - Relationships (3:47:02) - Advice for young people (3:52:16) - Regrets (3:56:01) - Mortality (4:12:04) - Love
Chapters
In this podcast, the host talks about the optimization obsession in different fields and interviews Sarma Melngailis, a chef and restaurateur, who was the subject of the Netflix documentary Bad Vegan.
00:00 - 04:26 (04:26)
Summary
In this podcast, the host talks about the optimization obsession in different fields and interviews Sarma Melngailis, a chef and restaurateur, who was the subject of the Netflix documentary Bad Vegan. The conversation involves her rise and fall in the industry, including a road trip from hell and her arrest, and how she learned important life lessons from her time in jail.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker talks about growing up with blue hair and being remembered by people on the streets of Boston.
04:26 - 11:12 (06:46)
Summary
The speaker talks about growing up with blue hair and being remembered by people on the streets of Boston. Despite the oddity, she was still a good student and didn't cause any problems.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker reflects on missed opportunities to meet interesting people in college, and discusses the power of being a father figure in guiding young individuals towards real love in life.
11:12 - 17:50 (06:38)
Summary
The speaker reflects on missed opportunities to meet interesting people in college, and discusses the power of being a father figure in guiding young individuals towards real love in life.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker, who identifies as sensitive, shares their discomfort with devastating movies and books, as they can trigger their emotions.
17:50 - 20:46 (02:55)
Summary
The speaker, who identifies as sensitive, shares their discomfort with devastating movies and books, as they can trigger their emotions. They describe instances where they've consciously avoided specific media because of their sensitivity.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The podcast speaker praises the kid's acting in the film where he plays a funny pothead on a couch.
20:46 - 23:26 (02:40)
Summary
The podcast speaker praises the kid's acting in the film where he plays a funny pothead on a couch. The movie overall is funny and features many good actors.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker discusses the benefits of underlining and marking up books on paper, and talks about the process of transferring important notes to a separate notebook.
23:26 - 26:52 (03:26)
Summary
The speaker discusses the benefits of underlining and marking up books on paper, and talks about the process of transferring important notes to a separate notebook.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker shares their ethical dilemma of buying used books when the author is still alive because they feel like the author deserves royalties, and how they promote books through social media by sharing pictures of the person reading the book.
26:52 - 32:21 (05:28)
Summary
The speaker shares their ethical dilemma of buying used books when the author is still alive because they feel like the author deserves royalties, and how they promote books through social media by sharing pictures of the person reading the book.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The guest speaker shares about her experience in curating recipes and products with her team while making a vanilla flavored cream that's a healthier option for fluff.
32:21 - 36:10 (03:49)
Summary
The guest speaker shares about her experience in curating recipes and products with her team while making a vanilla flavored cream that's a healthier option for fluff.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The podcast host discusses the similarities and differences between Nutella and Fluff, noting that while both are sweet spreads, they have different flavors and properties.
36:10 - 38:20 (02:10)
Summary
The podcast host discusses the similarities and differences between Nutella and Fluff, noting that while both are sweet spreads, they have different flavors and properties.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker reflects on her emotional connection to her pets, including her two cats and a new dog she adopted from a shelter, and how they impact her life in positive ways.
38:20 - 45:59 (07:38)
Summary
The speaker reflects on her emotional connection to her pets, including her two cats and a new dog she adopted from a shelter, and how they impact her life in positive ways.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker talks about a moment where she felt drawn to Leon while getting him and describes it as a "Candid Camera moment".
45:59 - 49:57 (03:57)
Summary
The speaker talks about a moment where she felt drawn to Leon while getting him and describes it as a "Candid Camera moment". She also mentions befriending two young street musicians who were busking.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The host interviews a convicted fraudster who shares insights on what it takes to commit fraud and the psychology behind it.
49:57 - 52:48 (02:51)
Summary
The host interviews a convicted fraudster who shares insights on what it takes to commit fraud and the psychology behind it.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
People may plead guilty for reasons other than actually being guilty, often under pressure from the threat of a heavy sentence, overwhelming stress, and a lack of financial resources to withstand a trial.
52:48 - 56:12 (03:23)
Summary
People may plead guilty for reasons other than actually being guilty, often under pressure from the threat of a heavy sentence, overwhelming stress, and a lack of financial resources to withstand a trial.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
A chef explains how she raised around eight or nine hundred grand to reopen her restaurant, but most of it went towards the restaurant and she disappeared due to a complicated love affair.
56:12 - 59:48 (03:35)
Summary
A chef explains how she raised around eight or nine hundred grand to reopen her restaurant, but most of it went towards the restaurant and she disappeared due to a complicated love affair.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
Waiting to drink coffee can allow the body to naturally boost its energy levels, while psychological violence can be just as damaging as physical violence, but is harder to identify and understand.
59:48 - 1:05:55 (06:07)
Summary
Waiting to drink coffee can allow the body to naturally boost its energy levels, while psychological violence can be just as damaging as physical violence, but is harder to identify and understand.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
Keeping secrets from loved ones, even with good intentions, can have negative consequences and even be compared to a genetic disposition.
1:05:56 - 1:17:03 (11:06)
Summary
Keeping secrets from loved ones, even with good intentions, can have negative consequences and even be compared to a genetic disposition.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The podcast discusses the impact of online trolls and how their behavior can quickly turn dangerous, especially for women.
1:17:03 - 1:23:28 (06:25)
Summary
The podcast discusses the impact of online trolls and how their behavior can quickly turn dangerous, especially for women. Despite the risks, it can be difficult to avoid reading comments that could be either negative or positive.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The host suggests that the guest needs social media coaching due to his odd behavior on Twitter, while also praising his exceptional ability to recall information and come up with impressive words.
1:23:28 - 1:29:20 (05:51)
Summary
The host suggests that the guest needs social media coaching due to his odd behavior on Twitter, while also praising his exceptional ability to recall information and come up with impressive words.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker reflects on the danger of falling in love quickly, as it can lead to rationalizing away red flags or negative traits in the other person.
1:29:20 - 1:35:31 (06:11)
Summary
The speaker reflects on the danger of falling in love quickly, as it can lead to rationalizing away red flags or negative traits in the other person. They share their personal aversion to conflict and admiration for heartbreak as a sign of true love.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
In this podcast, the speaker reflects on how sharing personal details on a podcast can make people feel like they know you intimately.
1:35:31 - 1:43:02 (07:30)
Summary
In this podcast, the speaker reflects on how sharing personal details on a podcast can make people feel like they know you intimately. The conversation also touches upon the risks of falling too quickly in love and how toxic relationships can be destructive.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
In this podcast, the speaker discusses ways to be productive during moments of waiting or time wasting, such as editing a book draft while on an airplane or using Gmail to message coworkers while outside.
1:43:02 - 1:48:00 (04:57)
Summary
In this podcast, the speaker discusses ways to be productive during moments of waiting or time wasting, such as editing a book draft while on an airplane or using Gmail to message coworkers while outside.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker discusses coping mechanisms and dissociation in the face of difficult situations and reflects on taking responsibility and consequences.
1:48:00 - 1:54:49 (06:49)
Summary
The speaker discusses coping mechanisms and dissociation in the face of difficult situations and reflects on taking responsibility and consequences.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The podcast host reflects on how comedians who are often perceived as crude or offensive, such as Ricky Gervais and Howard Stern, can paradoxically be some of the kindest and most sensitive people when encountered personally.
1:54:49 - 2:02:45 (07:56)
Summary
The podcast host reflects on how comedians who are often perceived as crude or offensive, such as Ricky Gervais and Howard Stern, can paradoxically be some of the kindest and most sensitive people when encountered personally.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The brains of sociopaths function differently from those of non-sociopaths, and therefore, they don't experience emotions or have the same tells, making them harder to detect.
2:02:45 - 2:07:47 (05:01)
Summary
The brains of sociopaths function differently from those of non-sociopaths, and therefore, they don't experience emotions or have the same tells, making them harder to detect.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker clarifies that audio spliced together in a way that made it seem like they married for money transfer is not true, and that the consequence of the person they married going to jail is just an inconvenience.
2:07:47 - 2:12:50 (05:02)
Summary
The speaker clarifies that audio spliced together in a way that made it seem like they married for money transfer is not true, and that the consequence of the person they married going to jail is just an inconvenience.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The podcast explores the excitement that comes with defying powerful forces and getting away with a crime, as well as the aftermath of losing everything in the process.
2:12:50 - 2:15:36 (02:46)
Summary
The podcast explores the excitement that comes with defying powerful forces and getting away with a crime, as well as the aftermath of losing everything in the process.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
In this episode, the host delves into the unconventional life of John McAfee and tries to understand his more fantastical beliefs, helping listeners to better comprehend the events surrounding his life.
2:15:36 - 2:19:03 (03:27)
Summary
In this episode, the host delves into the unconventional life of John McAfee and tries to understand his more fantastical beliefs, helping listeners to better comprehend the events surrounding his life.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker detects hidden intentions on some seemingly harmless conversations that contain inside jokes only understood by her, and despite realizing the potential danger of it, she remained fascinated by the situation.
2:19:03 - 2:23:41 (04:37)
Summary
The speaker detects hidden intentions on some seemingly harmless conversations that contain inside jokes only understood by her, and despite realizing the potential danger of it, she remained fascinated by the situation.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker reflects on their relationship with their abusive father and shares the coping mechanisms they developed to deal with their father's lack of remorse and empathy.
2:23:41 - 2:30:13 (06:32)
Summary
The speaker reflects on their relationship with their abusive father and shares the coping mechanisms they developed to deal with their father's lack of remorse and empathy.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The Theranos scandal is difficult to fully grasp with so much nuance and a slow build, making it a challenge for dramatization.
2:30:13 - 2:32:00 (01:47)
Summary
The Theranos scandal is difficult to fully grasp with so much nuance and a slow build, making it a challenge for dramatization. However, some are frustrated with people profiting off the scandal in fictionalized dramas.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The podcast guest shares her experience with mental health struggles and coping mechanisms, including hoarding medications as a potential suicide attempt.
2:32:00 - 2:34:20 (02:19)
Summary
The podcast guest shares her experience with mental health struggles and coping mechanisms, including hoarding medications as a potential suicide attempt.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker discusses feeling guilty about a past podcast experience that is now ruined for both her and the guest involved.
2:34:20 - 2:41:38 (07:17)
Summary
The speaker discusses feeling guilty about a past podcast experience that is now ruined for both her and the guest involved. She also shares her love for when guests are fans and understand the culture of the podcast.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker shares their experience of feeling constantly watched and monitored by someone, possibly due to being conditioned in a cult-like environment.
2:41:38 - 2:45:54 (04:16)
Summary
The speaker shares their experience of feeling constantly watched and monitored by someone, possibly due to being conditioned in a cult-like environment.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The podcast discusses the psychological aspect of why people believe in lies and how illusionist use the context of people's tendency to believe in amazing things.
2:45:54 - 2:53:50 (07:55)
Summary
The podcast discusses the psychological aspect of why people believe in lies and how illusionist use the context of people's tendency to believe in amazing things. It also touches upon the saying that the more unbelievable the lie is, the more it is believed.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker describes his experience of driving down the strip of Pigeon Forge and feeling like he had entered into a different universe.
2:53:50 - 2:58:25 (04:34)
Summary
The speaker describes his experience of driving down the strip of Pigeon Forge and feeling like he had entered into a different universe. He also talks about feeling safe at night because of the rough men who stand guard.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The justice system is often a place of powerlessness and helplessness, yet people can still show generosity and kindness.
2:58:25 - 3:04:55 (06:30)
Summary
The justice system is often a place of powerlessness and helplessness, yet people can still show generosity and kindness. However, the loss of stability and the consequences that follow can lead to devastating situations.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker talks about how Jeffrey Epstein targeted and manipulated people, regardless of their political beliefs, to maintain his power and avoid exposure of his crimes.
3:04:55 - 3:12:15 (07:20)
Summary
The speaker talks about how Jeffrey Epstein targeted and manipulated people, regardless of their political beliefs, to maintain his power and avoid exposure of his crimes.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker expresses interest in Steve Hassan's analysis of the Vicki Ward piece on Jeffrey Epstein and his connections, but finds it gut-wrenching due to Epstein's sociopathic behavior, and is concerned about the impact the revelations could have on society.
3:12:15 - 3:20:32 (08:17)
Summary
The speaker expresses interest in Steve Hassan's analysis of the Vicki Ward piece on Jeffrey Epstein and his connections, but finds it gut-wrenching due to Epstein's sociopathic behavior, and is concerned about the impact the revelations could have on society.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker discusses how people can thrive off of different dietary preferences and how it varies in different environments, an example being strange meat in Rikers.
3:20:32 - 3:27:14 (06:41)
Summary
The speaker discusses how people can thrive off of different dietary preferences and how it varies in different environments, an example being strange meat in Rikers.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
In this podcast, the speaker talks about how she unexpectedly found herself devouring grass-fed butter, even though it was not something she would normally eat.
3:27:14 - 3:29:57 (02:42)
Summary
In this podcast, the speaker talks about how she unexpectedly found herself devouring grass-fed butter, even though it was not something she would normally eat.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker discusses the challenges she faced while starting her business, One Lucky Duck, which encountered complication due to her existing ownership of a restaurant with Jeffrey Chattero.
3:29:57 - 3:33:07 (03:10)
Summary
The speaker discusses the challenges she faced while starting her business, One Lucky Duck, which encountered complication due to her existing ownership of a restaurant with Jeffrey Chattero.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker reminisces about the magical experience of eating French Toasted Baguette on a specific night and how delicious it would be if presented with a plate now.
3:33:07 - 3:37:47 (04:40)
Summary
The speaker reminisces about the magical experience of eating French Toasted Baguette on a specific night and how delicious it would be if presented with a plate now.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
Building a strong relationship can be achieved through shared excitement in mutual interests, rather than forcing enthusiasm for things outside of one's comfort zone.
3:37:47 - 3:42:26 (04:38)
Summary
Building a strong relationship can be achieved through shared excitement in mutual interests, rather than forcing enthusiasm for things outside of one's comfort zone. Finding excitement in another person's interests is a key factor in relationship satisfaction.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
Despite knowing he would not live to see it, a man puts all his energy in moving humanity forward, which was an admirable thing, as per the speaker.
3:42:27 - 3:47:36 (05:09)
Summary
Despite knowing he would not live to see it, a man puts all his energy in moving humanity forward, which was an admirable thing, as per the speaker. Red flags mostly refer to manipulation and extreme dysfunction.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker discusses how her personal experiences can be useful to younger females and help them understand the importance of confidence and self-awareness in relationships.
3:47:36 - 3:51:01 (03:24)
Summary
The speaker discusses how her personal experiences can be useful to younger females and help them understand the importance of confidence and self-awareness in relationships.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The host reflects on the benefit of sharing her own negative experiences, believing that people can learn from them and avoid similar mistakes in the future.
3:51:01 - 3:56:45 (05:43)
Summary
The host reflects on the benefit of sharing her own negative experiences, believing that people can learn from them and avoid similar mistakes in the future. She compares it to having a beautiful child from a previous abusive relationship, as the good comes from the bad.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker discusses the heartbreaking reality of dogs' short lifespans compared to humans and how adopting a dog means embracing the inevitable pain and loss that comes with their shortened lives.
3:56:47 - 3:59:42 (02:54)
Summary
The speaker discusses the heartbreaking reality of dogs' short lifespans compared to humans and how adopting a dog means embracing the inevitable pain and loss that comes with their shortened lives.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The morality of hunting for food when the animal has lived a free and happy life is debated.
3:59:42 - 4:09:12 (09:30)
Summary
The morality of hunting for food when the animal has lived a free and happy life is debated. Some find it acceptable as long as the animal isn't wasted, while others have a problem with it altogether.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker discusses the challenge of wanting specific things in a relationship but not wanting to hurt someone they love by keeping them from those things.
4:09:12 - 4:17:09 (07:57)
Summary
The speaker discusses the challenge of wanting specific things in a relationship but not wanting to hurt someone they love by keeping them from those things.
Episode#288 – Sarma Melngailis: Bad Vegan
PodcastLex Fridman Podcast
The speaker didn't feel nervous before a conversation because of the natural flow it would have, but was worried about potential judgment for their opinions.
4:17:09 - 4:21:54 (04:44)
Summary
The speaker didn't feel nervous before a conversation because of the natural flow it would have, but was worried about potential judgment for their opinions.