Episode
#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
1:30:36
Published: Mon Jun 20 2022
Description
Jessica Baum is a Licensed Mental Health Counsellor, Relationship Expert and an author. Attachment styles have become a hot topic recently, they underpin much of why we behave the way we do in relationships. Anxious attachment can be a serious challenge to overcome and gets in the way of everything, so working out how to defeat these dating demons is an important insight to uncover. Expect to learn what the science is behind attachment styles, why anxious attachment develops, whether you can fix your attachment style while you're single, how to communicate with an anxiously attached partner more effectively, how to control your body and mind if you feel anxious, why Love Island's promo photos aren't that bad and much more... Sponsors: Join the Modern Wisdom Community to connect with me & other listeners - https://modernwisdom.locals.com/ Get 20% discount & free shipping on your Lawnmower 4.0 at https://www.manscaped.com/ (use code MODERNWISDOM) Get 15% discount on Craftd London’s jewellery at https://bit.ly/cdwisdom (use code MW15) Get 30% discount on your at-home testosterone test at https://trylgc.com/modernwisdom (use code: MODERN30) Extra Stuff: Buy Anxiously Attached - https://amzn.to/3Ofghh2 Check out Jessica's Website - https://www.beselffull.com/ Get my free Reading List of 100 books to read before you die → https://chriswillx.com/books/ To support me on Patreon (thank you): https://www.patreon.com/modernwisdom - Get in touch. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact/
Chapters
In this podcast, experts discuss the science behind anxious attachment styles, how to communicate with an anxiously attached partner more effectively, and how to control your body and mind if you feel anxious.
00:00 - 03:58 (03:58)
Summary
In this podcast, experts discuss the science behind anxious attachment styles, how to communicate with an anxiously attached partner more effectively, and how to control your body and mind if you feel anxious.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
A guest on the podcast suggests that depicting an accurate image of yourself online when dating will lead to greater success.
03:58 - 13:45 (09:46)
Summary
A guest on the podcast suggests that depicting an accurate image of yourself online when dating will lead to greater success. This idea is contrasted with the reality that influencers and reality TV stars are often depicted less attractively than they appear in person.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
The trust and dependence a child develops with their primary caregiver in their early developmental years create an embedded pattern that highly correlates with their romantic relationships in the future.
13:45 - 21:25 (07:40)
Summary
The trust and dependence a child develops with their primary caregiver in their early developmental years create an embedded pattern that highly correlates with their romantic relationships in the future.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
The hypervigilance of a partner's needs can lead to self-abandonment if they feel uncomfortable disconnecting.
21:26 - 28:39 (07:13)
Summary
The hypervigilance of a partner's needs can lead to self-abandonment if they feel uncomfortable disconnecting. Individuals can try to resolve their attachment issues through someone reflective of their primary caregivers and those who grew up without significant attunement and co-regulation may have potent initial reactions to "love bombing."
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
This podcast discusses the nervous system and how it is responsible for our body's survival mechanisms and the feeling of connection in relationships.
28:39 - 37:15 (08:35)
Summary
This podcast discusses the nervous system and how it is responsible for our body's survival mechanisms and the feeling of connection in relationships. It also highlights the importance of understanding how our partner's actions can affect our nervous system and lead to explosive reactions.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
Anxious people need to learn how to self-regulate or co-regulate with others to develop the neuroplasticity to self-soothe.
37:15 - 42:17 (05:01)
Summary
Anxious people need to learn how to self-regulate or co-regulate with others to develop the neuroplasticity to self-soothe. While avoidant individuals must learn to be vulnerable and start to co-regulate in healthy ways to let others in.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
Anxious and secure attachment styles in relationships can either create a positive or negative dynamic.
42:17 - 48:12 (05:55)
Summary
Anxious and secure attachment styles in relationships can either create a positive or negative dynamic. One partner's security can help to ease anxiety in the other, leading to a deeper connection.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
Tips on how to help a friend dealing with relationship anxiety include realizing that their partner is not intentionally causing this reaction, helping them calm down and get back to a safe place, and encouraging them to communicate their feelings with their partner in a non-confrontational way.
48:13 - 52:44 (04:31)
Summary
Tips on how to help a friend dealing with relationship anxiety include realizing that their partner is not intentionally causing this reaction, helping them calm down and get back to a safe place, and encouraging them to communicate their feelings with their partner in a non-confrontational way.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
The speaker discusses how extending the exhale part of breathing can help manage anxiety and de-escalate the nervous system.
52:45 - 59:03 (06:18)
Summary
The speaker discusses how extending the exhale part of breathing can help manage anxiety and de-escalate the nervous system. Techniques such as box breathing, extending exhales, and having mantras are helpful in reaching empathy and understanding to get back to a place of connection.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
By opening ourselves up to new experiences and neural pathways, we can start to heal from trauma and form new connections in the brain.
59:03 - 1:10:44 (11:41)
Summary
By opening ourselves up to new experiences and neural pathways, we can start to heal from trauma and form new connections in the brain.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
Dr. Gabor Maté discusses the importance of integrating psychedelic experiences while sober, especially for those with anxious attachment.
1:10:44 - 1:17:40 (06:55)
Summary
Dr. Gabor Maté discusses the importance of integrating psychedelic experiences while sober, especially for those with anxious attachment. He also highlights the potential risks of the current psychedelic movement.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
The author explains the importance of forming healthy relationships outside of ourselves in order to develop a healthy relationship with ourselves.
1:17:40 - 1:22:57 (05:17)
Summary
The author explains the importance of forming healthy relationships outside of ourselves in order to develop a healthy relationship with ourselves. She highlights the negative effects of the societal emphasis on independence and self-sufficiency.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
The idea of being a solo ranger and a sovereign individual is popular but it's important to value the interconnectedness of humanity and move towards community because the quality of life comes down to the relationships in it.
1:22:57 - 1:29:10 (06:12)
Summary
The idea of being a solo ranger and a sovereign individual is popular but it's important to value the interconnectedness of humanity and move towards community because the quality of life comes down to the relationships in it.
Episode#489 - Jessica Baum - How To Deal With Being Anxiously Attached
PodcastModern Wisdom
In this podcast episode, Jessica Baum, LMHC explains how anxious attachment patterns work and how one can overcome it.
1:29:10 - 1:30:33 (01:23)
Summary
In this podcast episode, Jessica Baum, LMHC explains how anxious attachment patterns work and how one can overcome it. She shares insights into the biology of anxious attachment and the tools to help overcome it.