Episode

Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
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1:00:46
Published: Mon Oct 31 2022
Description

A survival guide to adult friendship: how to find your people, have more fun, and create meaningful friendships as an adult. This is the topic you and everyone else are thinking about. From making new friends to staying connected to your old ones, to the thing that’s really hard: what do you do when your friendships start to fade? This is something I’ve been dying to talk to you about because I am right here, shoulder to shoulder with you, feeling lonely, left out, and wondering…Where did all my friends go? I know I’m not the only one because when I do see my friends or meet someone new, everyone is talking about how they never see their friends anymore. Let’s fix that. I spent a lot of time reflecting on the things that I’m doing that keep me from putting myself out there (which I know I need to do) and did extensive research on the topic. What I discovered is both comforting and empowering. I can’t wait to share it with you. I can boil all of this research down to the 5 lies you and I tell ourselves about friendship. These lies are keeping you from having the best relationships of your life. That’s why you need to hear them. So did I. You also need to hear the truth bombs I’m dropping and the smarty pants research I found to back it all up. Because once you stop repeating these lies, your life will open up again. You’ll have an easier time finding, making, and strengthening your relationships with friends.  And most importantly, your friendships will align with who you really are and what you really want in this chapter of your life. Today it’s just you and me, friend to friend, figuring sh*t out together. So let’s go. Xo Mel 

Chapters
Join Mel Robbins as she talks about the topic of adult friendship, sharing her thoughts and experiences on why it's challenging to make friends as an adult.
00:00 - 01:46 (01:46)
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Adult Friendship
Summary

Join Mel Robbins as she talks about the topic of adult friendship, sharing her thoughts and experiences on why it's challenging to make friends as an adult.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
The speaker reflects on the issue of adult friendship, and shares five lies that we tell ourselves about making new friends as adults, with the aim of tackling the problem.
01:46 - 06:40 (04:54)
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Adult Friendship
Summary

The speaker reflects on the issue of adult friendship, and shares five lies that we tell ourselves about making new friends as adults, with the aim of tackling the problem.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
The speaker urges individuals to stop comparing their lives to what they see on social media, as it can lead to feelings of worthlessness and lack of motivation.
06:40 - 10:32 (03:52)
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Social Media
Summary

The speaker urges individuals to stop comparing their lives to what they see on social media, as it can lead to feelings of worthlessness and lack of motivation. Spending an hour a day on social media only reinforces the idea that everyone else's life is a party except for yours.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
The key to making your life a party is to start throwing them and stop waiting to be invited.
10:32 - 15:24 (04:52)
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Social Life
Summary

The key to making your life a party is to start throwing them and stop waiting to be invited. It's important to have close friends, even just one "4 a.m." friend who you can rely on and slowly build more friendships from there.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
The belief that people don't like you can prevent you from putting yourself out there.
15:24 - 18:45 (03:20)
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self-improvement
Summary

The belief that people don't like you can prevent you from putting yourself out there. We must combat this programming and remind ourselves that it's just a lie we've been telling ourselves.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
The ‘liking gap’ is the reason some people are hesitant to ask for support, even if it’s from their friends.
18:45 - 23:18 (04:32)
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Self-Doubt
Summary

The ‘liking gap’ is the reason some people are hesitant to ask for support, even if it’s from their friends. This self-doubt about one’s own likeability can be overcome by reminding oneself that people like them and that they deserve to ask for help.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
Holding on to friendships that no longer feel right puts pressure on yourself, and you might miss out on new connections and growth opportunities.
23:18 - 31:24 (08:05)
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Friendship
Summary

Holding on to friendships that no longer feel right puts pressure on yourself, and you might miss out on new connections and growth opportunities. Letting go of friendships that no longer serve you creates space for more authentic and supportive relationships in your life.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
This podcast episode discusses how the need to be liked by everyone can be detrimental and ultimately, how to overcome it.
31:24 - 37:06 (05:41)
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Personal Growth
Summary

This podcast episode discusses how the need to be liked by everyone can be detrimental and ultimately, how to overcome it. It also touches on how the COVID-19 pandemic has shifted the default behavior to staying home.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
Exploring why we think talking to strangers is a bad thing, a behavioral scientist found that tuning in to what we need and moving towards people that feel supportive can help break the fear and make social interactions more enjoyable.
37:06 - 41:46 (04:40)
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Behavioral Science
Summary

Exploring why we think talking to strangers is a bad thing, a behavioral scientist found that tuning in to what we need and moving towards people that feel supportive can help break the fear and make social interactions more enjoyable.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
This podcast discusses the three types of friendships - friends for a reason, friends for a season, and lifetime friends - and emphasizes the importance of adapting to changing seasons of life to allow new friendships to emerge.
41:46 - 47:45 (05:59)
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Friendship
Summary

This podcast discusses the three types of friendships - friends for a reason, friends for a season, and lifetime friends - and emphasizes the importance of adapting to changing seasons of life to allow new friendships to emerge.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
College students often feel alone and struggle to make new friends.
47:45 - 52:37 (04:51)
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College, Friendship
Summary

College students often feel alone and struggle to make new friends. However, just like in elementary school, forming connections with classmates takes time and effort.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
Research covered in the New York Times found that receiving an unexpected text from a friend can strengthen the friendship and make you feel immediately connected.
52:37 - 57:18 (04:41)
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Friendship
Summary

Research covered in the New York Times found that receiving an unexpected text from a friend can strengthen the friendship and make you feel immediately connected. It's important to make a practice of reaching out to one friend every day with a random message.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast
A call to action to send the podcast episode to friends who may be going through a tough time and to show them that they are not alone and to bring more richness and happiness to both your life and theirs.
57:18 - 1:00:43 (03:24)
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Self-help
Summary

A call to action to send the podcast episode to friends who may be going through a tough time and to show them that they are not alone and to bring more richness and happiness to both your life and theirs.

Episode
Why Is Adult Friendship So Hard? 5 Lies You Tell Yourself & the Truth You Need to Hear
Podcast
The Mel Robbins Podcast